Trying to change myself is hard but I learn what my council taught me and also my parents. She’s right, they are my parents and I must obey them but sometimes we need sometimes to have freewill. What I mean is to decide your own way. The only you need is to give them your freedom is to be responsible and have brave yourself that you can do it. You are free but sometimes freedom has also some limitations which you will be guided but you mustn’t think that my friends are my enemies.
My parents are right. The reason why they are doing this is because you’re not responsible and they just want to protect you especially you’re the youngest one. I was blessed because I was proved the things I need, I went to outside the Philippines and other good deeds. They’re just my parents and they’re trying their best to be a good parent and they are. J
I learn also that it’s good to help our friends but there are some limitations. What I mean is we can guide them but let them solve their own just like what I did right now with my friends. I guide them but they will solve their own.
What I did right now to my best friend is just leave her alone. She has problems, she has something that she want to solve by her own, and she will need space not just I’ve done something wrong but to lessen and she needs solve other problems that are important than this. This is just a minimal problem. I know at the end she will forgive me but in time and I’ll wait for that. I am also too needs a space to solve my own problems that are important like my schoolwork and my family. She is still there as my best friend whatever happens.
I’ll leave her alone because she is a woman now not a girl I known before. I'm doing this because not just to give her space but also respect and learn by her own but if she needs help… I’m also there to help her to guide what is right and wrong. I’m just a person who committed a mistake and I’m just his best friend or kuya who’s just guide her because he loves her as my bff…:D
“I should be happy”
Earlier this morning, I went to Abong-abong to reflect myself of what I’ve done to my best friend, to my friends especially to my family. I regret of what I’ve done because this isn’t me anymore. I’m different now… My best friend is right… She’s just telling herself the truth and she tried herself to be a good friend…
I got out of my nerves that time because I went wild when somebody needs something and doesn’t reply you for 10 times, you’ll get mad… That’s when our friendship stated to get blur…
When I went there I realize something… Obviously, the place has change since I my last visit 5 years ago. 5 years ago, my friends before aren’t the friends you used to hang out. They’re different and they aren’t my friends, they’re using me for any purpose. They want me to change me to good to bad and they did, I went mean, I sometimes get into trouble and almost lost myself until 1 day, I realized that I wasn’t myself anymore… So I tried to change it… but it’s hard… I have no place to go but to my parents… but it wasn’t good enough… So I went to Abong-abong to reflect myself and ask “Puwede ba yo kambya?” (Can I be change?). Back then, I was wishing for something but it’s not a thing, it’s someone who can be trust on, always on by my side and share my innermost secrets. Then, I realized I was wishing for a best friend… This is silly because I was holding a 1 peso coin that time and I threw it for that wish and I ask myself in a few moments “Loko ba yo? Hahaha (laughing) Tan wish yo kay chene yo best friend… (Laugh out Loud) Byen loko gat yo hente. hahaha” and suddenly I was crying without a reason… I never told this story to someone, not even my siblings, my parents, even my best friend because if I told them, I know what is there reaction “Loko ya ka Tennyl?”
After 5 years, I went back to the same place where I was reflect myself. I ask the same question again “Ya kambya ya yo pero… ya keda gat yo malo” I was knew that I won’t be change until I close my eyes and cry… cry until I talk to myself… “Ara, ya pwede ya yo sabe kosa di miyo pakamali di miyo pero di pisil gat keda bweno… Ta pikura yo kambya pero egual lang sempre… Miyo Tata pati Nana rabyaw sila kumigo kay byen rabyoso yo pirmi. Si Hedda rabyaw kumigo kay mga kosa di miyo ablada kunele kay ele el hinde ta keda bweno best friend… Bensaba yo sila el mali… pero iyo gane el mali… iyo el chene kulpa hinde sila… Maskin chene hinde bweno nagkaraan di miyo mga erpats pero hinde yo dapat rabya kel kay kabaw ya kel… Si kosa sila palta kumigo, hinde yo dapat man blame kundi iyo dapat kay iyo el palta kunila… Kun Hedda dapat hinde yo man blame kunele kay maskin kosa le ase, hente lang le syempre… Iyo el mali, kay hinde yo ya keda bweno amigo pati ermano di su yu… Iyo el palta aki… Si kosa el di miyo mali Hedz, patawad… Tan sisi ya yo el mga di miyo… sana man patawad ya tu kumigo pati dale tu kumigo last chance…”
I kept crying until I pray… “Lord, pasyensa ya… byen malo gat yo… hinde gat yo bweno hente… salamat kay ya dele tu kumigo best friend pero…dibolbe yo kuntigo el di miyo wish na chene yo best friend kay hinde yo karapad dapat… hinde yo y keda bweno amigo…”. My eyes kept close until I dream something… I’m still in the same place but totally different until I heard a voice… “Tennyl…” I was wondering who was that and he kept talking to me… “Tennyl, el mga kulpa di tu ay hinde dapat na keda tu malo… Tali ye el di tu yu mga kulpa pero hinde tu se ase keda ali na di tu yu corason. Tan sisi ya tu kosa el mga kulpa pero hinde pa se ya kaba Tennyl, puwede pa tu man pidi pasyensya pero nesisita tu kambya pati spera. Destiny will tell you when will it be.” I was crying of what he had said and he continues about me and my best friend… “Tennyl, si Hedda rabyaw pati hinde le kuntigo ta ase kaso kay hinde lang tu yan diskusya el di su yu personalidad pati ya ase tu duwele el di su yu corason. El di su yu corason ara byen fuego le kuntigo pero adrento pa del di su yu ko corason, chene pa le amor kuntigo kay etu el di su yu best friend. Rabyaw le apwera pero adrento byen triste le kay porke tu ya keda ancina kunele. You apologized of what you have done to her and you ask her forgiveness but she didn’t give you, porke? Hinde lang pasenysa le kere, pati di tu yu kustumbre ase kambya. Alya le puwede dale el di tu yu forgiveness…” I realized of what he had said but something bothers me… is this true or just a dream… I ask him “Chene ba yo chance na kambya pati alegre?” He answer only in a few words “It is in you Tennyl. Choose the right path and there you will be realized” I kept asking… “Is this God who is talking to me?” Then in a few moment, I open my eyes and I realized of what he said that I should be change. Even thought its hard, at least I tried to change what was wrong but I can change in the future.
I felt happy all of a sudden. Maybe I was realized that why should I’ll be lonely while I’ll should be happy. Why should I’ll be frustrated while I’ll should calm down. Why should I’ll be angry while I’ll should be understand and calm myself. Why should I’ll be hurt while I’ll should be proud for them.
I know it’s hard to ask her forgiveness but I’ll wait and change what I was wrong. Even thought you’re ignoring me, I’ll stop always to saying “Hello, Ketal?, Hi, Have a nice day, or even BFF” to you best friend because you’re still my best friend what ever happens and I will always care for you. That’s my promise. :D
The Sims 3 is coming
This June 2, 2009, Electronic Arts (EA for short) will release the next generation of The Sims from the creators of Spore. The Sims 3.
This is the official trailer from The Sims YouTube Channel. Enjoy!
Believe your life is special
Sometimes life can’t give you everything, well aside that you are in the place in the middle of nowhere but somehow I felt unpleasant in every movements I’ve. Not I am suffer illness or abnormality but the people around me.
I myself like to be social on others but sometimes social can’t give you all the joy and happiness. On the side of that, life is social. I bother myself why people aren’t the way it was? I mean why can’t people just be themselves one in a while because people are acting that they are special to other people instead of believing themselves as special.
That’s what people now a days are not a just playing themselves as a toy instead acting like themselves. Why can’t just act themselves they what? Just because their lives are not very popular doesn’t mean that they’re not special. Just what in the movie Kung Fu Panda, the secret ingredient to have the power is nothing because it’s all you.You have to believe it’s there special on it.
Francis M.: The King of Rap
Last Friday, March 6, 2009 was the saddest day of the whole showbiz industry and to the country. Francis Magalona passed away at 12:00NN. It's hard to believe that but it's true. Francis was suffered an acute myelogenous leukemia. It's a marked by an abnormal increase in the number of myeloblasts especially in bone marrowand blood, that is characterized by symptoms similar to those of acute lymphoblastic leukemia, and that may occur either in childhood or adulthood (dictionary.com).
Francis M. was a true legend of the music industry. He brought his proud to us as Filipino. He's not just a rapper, he's also a photographer, a producer of a music video, an archived businessman for the shirt design, a true friend to the industry and people around him and also a true father to his family.
We will miss you but your music will still be legend.
Francis M. was a true legend of the music industry. He brought his proud to us as Filipino. He's not just a rapper, he's also a photographer, a producer of a music video, an archived businessman for the shirt design, a true friend to the industry and people around him and also a true father to his family.
We will miss you but your music will still be legend.
